Quote:Josh Sorokach @Joshsorokach 56m56 minutes ago
Every once in awhile I revisit the very best thing on the internet: @PFTompkins' vintage American Idol recaps:
http://www.vulture.com/2011/05/american_idol_james_crying_tom.html

Quote:Paul F. Tompkins @PFTompkins 34m34 minutes ago
Paul F. Tompkins Retweeted Josh Sorokach
I'll always RT when anyone posts these cuz 1) I think they're still funny 2) watching that show scooped out a generous portion of my soul

Quote:Josh Sorokach‏Verified account @Joshsorokach 15m15 minutes ago
Replying to @PFTompkins
They definitely still hold up... much like the powerful vocals of the one true American Idol, Ms. Haley Reinhart.

Quote:Haley tells us that Jimmy Iovine has offered her an unreleased Lady Gaga song called “You and I” (don’t ask Jimmy how he came by it; better you don’t know!). Haley tells us she sought and received the Lady’s blessing, and so she will favor us with this song that seemingly fell off the back of a truck. The low parts are a little too low for Haley’s range, but overall she does a good job. She is clearly thrilled to sing this song and her excitement seems real. Having watched this season for the last quarter-century, I feel I can tell when someone’s just getting off on receiving attention and when someone genuinely loves the singing part of the singing. The song’s right up Haley’s alley, and although she is still an undoubtedly awkward physical performer, I enjoyed watching her. Also, look how this guitarist is playing his guitar like he’s trying to strangle it to death.


JUDGES: Steven likes it! J.Lo says Haley probably made a mistake in choosing a song people don’t already know (boos from the crowd!). Randy thought it was too risky and that Haley is more like a Joss Stone, who to the best of anyone’s knowledge has never sung an unreleased Lady Gaga song.


ME: Guess what? Haley is the best. I love that she did that song, and I love that she went with what she thought was the superior song and not the most recognizable cover. Haley is more of an artist than anyone else left in this competition. That is both my opinion and an immutable fact, so that really works out in favor of me being right. And again, if this song was such a bad choice, why was it offered to her in the first place? Do Jimmy Iovine and the judges all work for the same show? If not, can the story line about those two camps working against each other be the main focus of this dumb program?

Quote:Haley will close it out with “House of the Rising Sun.” Fuck yes. I bet she is going to tear it up. And I hope she will have extra anger at the judges for critiquing her for the Lady Gaga choice. At Sheryl Crow’s suggestion, Haley starts it off a cappella. Good call, Sheryl, because it sounds cool. The band kicks in, the lights change, and the stage looks fiery and swirly, like Haley is singing from the floor of a live volcano. Haley goes for it. It sounds like she hits every note. She executes a big rock finish, and there you go. Standing ovation from the judges. Those creeps. They must recognize the song. I love anything I’ve already heard, too! Keep your criteria for enjoyment simple, it makes life easier!

JUDGES: Steven likes it! J.Lo says she may have picked up on some anger at the judges, too (J.Lo don’t you see how much sense we make together I’m sorry I called you a creep), but “that song has never been sang like that before.” Randy says Haley has grown by leaps and bounds and that her performance was amazing.

ME: Haley will not win this thing, but I hope she gets a nice career out of this show. And I hope she can make it for another couple weeks, because if she goes at the next elimination, this show will be so, so hard for me to watch. And unless Osama bin Laden manages to emerge from the ocean Creepshow-style the night of the finale, I don’t have a prayer of avoiding the James vs. Scotty showdown.

Pray for me.

Quote:We kick it off with Haley Reinhart doing an impression of Kristen Wiig’s hypothetical impression of Haley Reinhart singing “God Bless the Child.” She is going all-out vocally because she didn’t do so well the night before, and her distorting the lyrics into mere word sounds wows the judges.

Quote:I am not a fan of Haley, in large part owing to an unfair association I am making between her and someone I know that I don’t like. Sorry, Haley, the arrangement of your facial features has me rooting against you.

Quote:
ME: I found it all the way boring. Haley persists in looking like that person I don't like, so I am still against her. This is how life works, Haley. Nature has arranged your features in such a way as to indicate to me that you are my enemy. Sorry.

Quote:ME: I have not been the biggest Haley fan, which, as you know, is Haley's face’s fault. But I actually liked her cover of this song better than the original. Even though I still kind of didn’t like it. Because it’s not a good song. My point is, I may be warming up to Haley, which vaguely annoys me. But she handles the lipstick business with great aplomb. Not just regular! Great!

Quote:ME: Jesus. I full-on like Haley now. What has happened to me? I can no longer hold her face against her! I thought she did a good job with this song, even with all the runs and other vocal gymnastics that I don’t really care for. I even sorta enjoyed her pseudo-yodel at the end.
DO I EVER NEED TO HEAR THIS MOTOWN SONG AGAIN? Hm. Yes. A few more times. It’s a good one, but it’s on the line.

Quote:When Beyoncé says that Haley is going to sing “What Is and What Should Never Be” by Led Zeppelin, I laugh out loud. Like, from my very soul, this bark of joy comes out of me. I don’t even care that much about Led Zeppelin. This is just different. I also laugh because the first time I ever saw a bong, the dirtbag who owned it said, “Its name is ‘What Is and What Should Never Be,’” and I had no idea what he was talking about or that people named bongs. It would be years before I got into and then out of Led Zeppelin. I haven’t thought of that story since. Haley, I love you. The moment she starts, I laugh with joy again, for real! I am thrilled that she is singing this song. She is accompanied not by Idol’s in-house “Six-String Strangler,” but by her own father.

Quote:RESULTS. Lauren is in. I yell — I yell — “OH NO!” Out loud, all the way out. Haley is dumbfounded. Lauren’s expression is not the usual expression you see on this show at this moment. There’s no rush of relief, no stunned discovery. She looks like she got an expensive gift she’d asked for and was reasonably sure she was going to get; actually seeing it unwrapped brought her the joy of confirmation and the thrill of possession.


Lauren turns to Haley, whose face is nakedly, angrily disappointed. Haley looks frustrated. She doesn’t even look in Lauren’s direction, and Lauren doesn’t make a move in her direction. A hug always happens here. But the absence of affection between Lauren and Haley is two feet wide and three feet thick. It dawns on me that Lauren wasn’t turning to Haley when she won, she was turning to Ryan to celebrate, and Haley was in the way. It seems like an eternity before a perfunctory embrace between the two girls takes place. As the judges give Haley a standing ovation, Steven Tyler is the only one who looks remorseful. Randy and J.Lo seem to project … I don’t know, exactly. “We told you so?” But I like Steven for looking as if something bad happened here. Wrapping things up with Ryan, Haley follows the new tradition of briefly bragging (“I rocked it out”) and then closes the show with “Benny and the Jets.” She has gathered herself after the initial shock, and, in the first verse of “Benny and The Jets,” a song I do not even like that much, she entertains me more than Lauren has with her entire catalogue of performances to date. Haley goes down and sings with the other Fallen Idols, and ends up going out on a note of good humor and dignity. I will sorely miss Haley next week, and not just because she would have sung something other than modern country. I will miss the surprise she would have brought to the last night of performance before Scotty wins this stupid contest.

Talking to my wife and expressing my frustration with having to watch and write about what will most certainly be a mind-numbingly boring fifteen hours of two children singing interchangeable songs on Tuesday, I say, “I hate that I got even this invested. It’s not like I’m gonna buy Haley’s album when it comes out.” My wife replied, “Who knows what it’ll be? Maybe she’ll turn out to be a great artist.” And you know what? Maybe she will! Who knows what she’ll do on her own, with original material?

Haley, you are all right in my book. And here’s a message to all tweens and grandmas out there, the ones who put Scotty and Lauren in the finale: go fnck yourselves.

Quote:Judy McCreery‏ @JudyMacGarner 41m41 minutes ago
Judy McCreery Retweeted Casey Abrams
Happy late bday @HaleyReinhart ...And @caseybassy you are still the bomb

Quote:scottymccreery
SHE SAID YES!!!

Quote:Scotty McCreery @ScottyMcCreery 1h1 hour ago
The trouble with girls is over! 'ring emoji'?

Quote:Tusk‏ @HaleysTusk 2m2 minutes ago
@HaleyReinhart doing something with @PMJofficial with @CaseyBassy @TMegiaAI10 @JSaysKnee BET!!
#Season10 #BusyHaley!!

Quote:ICM Partners ICM Partners represents talent in the fields of motion picture, television, books, music, live performance, branded entertainment, and new media. www.icmpartners.com

Quote:Scott Bradlee‏ @scottbradlee 1m1 minute ago
Had a blast at the #GalaOfChampions fundraiser tonight with @pmjofficial! #icmpartners #pmj

Quote:thialorei
Had a wonderful time jamming out on stage with the incredibly talented PMJ crew at the Gala of Champions tonight

Quote:American Idol season 10 alum Haley Reinhart has signed with ICM Partners, Billboard has learned.

Quote:Casey Abrams‏ @CaseyBassy
9m9 minutes ago

Yo @ScottyMcCreery is a real stand up guy. He took care of my Mom, Dad and Grammy.
He has a new hit single #fivemoreminutes (Great song. Scotty’s a great story teller.
https://youtu.be/2dPDBU9MC8c

Ps. How beautiful is my family?